About that time I made a big decision for my future self

What happens when you make a big decision for your future self?

Sometimes the way opens up...and sometimes you get in the way.

As you're reading this email, I'm following through on a decision the February version of Stephanie made for the August version of Stephanie and I'm feeling immense gratitude. I believe in the power of resting, of pausing, and of just being. Admittedly, sometimes I'm great at it, sometimes I'm not.

I'm on the tail end of a season where I haven't been great at it. And, I feel it.

Do you know that feeling? The one where even after a good night's sleep you're still tired, when you want to do something but just can't follow through on it, or nothing feels remotely interesting anymore? That was me earlier this summer. Burned. Out.

Apparently, I believed that I could help people navigate their burnout without actually becoming burned out myself. (Ha! Oh, the irony...) I committed to myself that I would show up for you in these emails as authentically me -- not fake, not preachy, not having all the answers. Just as me. So, I want you to know that even as someone who coaches people about the warning signs of being burned out, I missed them (or ignored them) in myself.

Over the course of this summer, I've been on a journey of recovery. Mental, physical, and spiritual. Octavia Raheem's work has been a powerful support for me (IG @octaviaraheem), here are her thoughts that sat me right down in my seat and brought tears to my eyes.

I want this for me -- and I want this for you too.

Read this. Then read it again.

Fortunately, February Stephanie had a gut feeling that August Stephanie was going to need a break. A big one.

Today, I'm on my way to Banff in Alberta, Canada to hike for a week with six other amazing women. (Yes, it sounds magical. Yes, I recognize it's a privilege. Yes, I recognize that earned it.)

And yet...I've never done this before. And honestly, I'm freaking out a bit inside.

I've never closed down my business for two weeks (as a solopreneur, that's super scary). I've never left town right in the midst of the end-of-summer and back-to-school rush. I've never put a hard boundary around time for myself the way I am right now. And honestly, I'm freaking out a bit inside.

Feburary Stephanie was wise, but June and July Stephanies were a real pain in the a**. ALL the reasons to not go were front and center, yelling at me... "must be nice that you get to go away, who do you think you are?", "This irresponsible, bad timing" and "I can't believe you're going by yourself right now, your family needs you." See? Told you. A real pain.

I almost got in my own way. I almost backed out.
But I didn't.

While this is certainly the most extreme (and extravagant) way to get some deep rest, it's only one more step on my journey. All along, I've been tuning in, revising, and returning to the things that bring me joy, that fill my soul, and that bring me peace. You don't have to wait until you can get a big getaway to really rest, you can start in little ways today. Please, start in little ways today.

And, listen to your own wisdom. That nudge, that "yaaassss!" feeling, that curiosity... listen to it. You never know what you're setting up now that your future self will be grateful for.